Wednesday, April 27, 2011


Lindsey, although you have been dead lo these many years, you still have more brain activity than any living Yankee fan. I am a big fan of your "Mets Blob", and hereby recommend it to my legion of followers.
By-the about those 5 WINS IN A ROW!?! You know what that means, right? A losing streak is on the way!

Tuesday, April 26, 2011


Now, don't get me wrong. The Miracle of the original Easter Sunday was nothing to sneeze at. I mean, rising from the dead is no insignificant feat, even for the Son of the Almighty.
Nonetheless, the Easter Miracle may just have to take a back seat to that which the Mets are attempting to accomplish tonight. This assemblage of underachievers, led by a well-meaning wackjob, and run by a front office that's hamstrung by financial difficulties, will tonight go after their fifth consecutive victory.
If they can pull off this feat, little children may be hunting for assorted dyed baseballs next Easter.
Obviously, I'm counting on the fact that the Almighty Creator of the Universe has a sense of humor. Or else...See you in Hell!

Sunday, April 24, 2011


The world is round. If you disagree, stop reading now. Because as sure as the world is round, Met fans are vastly superior to Yankee fans. Period. This is a given. If you're a Met fan, you revel in this fact; it helps you through your teams tough times. If you're a Yankee fan, you know this just as well, or perhaps better, than any Met fan. You just refuse to acknowledge its validity, to the world if not yourself.
You see, anybody with a twenty-dollar bill can be a Yankee fan. Just pick yourself up one of those bland, black and white Yankee caps, (so prevelant in the crime-ridden sections of most major American cities), acquaint yourself enough with baseball history to know that the Yankees have won 27 World Series, and you're a Yankee fan.
Of course, the major prerequisite for being a Yankee is that you are a loser. You see, lacking that singular factor, Yankee fandom has no purpose. But as a loser, as one in need of some semblence of a positive identity, the Yankees seem to be the ultimate quick fix. No personal accomplishment is necessary, no extraordinary human quality is needed. You just pop on your Yankee cap and somehow, magically soak in the success.
In reality, of course, self-fulfillment is not achieved this way. One's successes must be their own; self-made.
This type of person does not need the shallow satisfaction brought on by Yankee fandom. This individual is confident in his own abilities. He is a giver, not a taker. He need not take his sence of self-worth from the Yankees. Rather, he is able to give his loyalty and support to the Mets.
Being a Met fan is not for the squeamish. The Mets came into the world as the under-achieving stepchild. Yankee fans can robotically spout out their "27 championships" retort. Met fans must think. They must be clever and self-deprecating. They must be loyal through adversity, even with an alternative, better team with the same city limits.
The Yankee fan, by definition, could never live up to such expectations. If he could, he'd never be a Yankee fan. He'd have no need to be.
And so, as far superior as the Yankees have been over the Mets as a baseball team through the decades, even FARTHER superior have Met fans been over Yankee fans.
End of story.

Thursday, April 21, 2011


Another day, another loss. There's a sense of serenity that comes from the continuity. Another month of this and I'll be absolutely comatose.

Wednesday, April 20, 2011


After a nearly unprecedented stretch of two days without a defeat (one win and one off-day), the sun once again rises in the east. The Mets lose.
A powerful 4-hit attack backed superb pitching and sparkling (2 error) defense to produce a 6-1 loss at the hands of the Houston Astros Tuesday night. The two teams are scheduled to meet again tonight, in a joint effort to produce another Met defeat. Be sure to check your local listings for time and channel...of "Gilligan's Island" reruns.

Sunday, April 17, 2011


With the Mets actually WINNING a game today, the astronomers of the world are focussing their sights on the western horizon, to see if the sun actually RISES IN THE WEST tomorrow morning. We'll have details as they become available.


I have been asked by my legion of follower [singular intentional] why I chose the name MetWop for myself. Well, MetWop is actually my given name, appearing on my birth certificate (just kidding).
"MetWop" combines two of my passions: the Mets and my Italianism. In some ways the two are similar, such as in their shared association with fine foods (famed pasta, fish and beef dishes for Italy, the Shake Shack for the Mets).
But in one important way, they are vastly different. Met fans stick with the team, throughout the season and throughout their lives, whereas Italy generally switches sides 3 to 5 times during the average war.
And so, for better or for worse, I was born a Met and I was born a Wop, so MetWop I shall be.